Dé Luain, Bealtaine 28, 2007

Not enough coffee...

I was excited about playing this morning, I really was. It had been a while since I had gotten to play my electric, and was looking forward to playing. If only things would have gone well, somethings are just amazing certainties. Problems with the Churches sound system are one of mine. The group hadn't been able to practice the week before, the room just wasn't available, so we met at eight this morning. I'm glad that I stopped long enough to grab a cup of coffee, because I was about to need it. It took me too long to set up my cords and effect boxes, so I didn't have any time to simply try things out again and make sure everything was sounding correctly. I had to borrow a chord from the back because I didn't have my second one. I miss tuned one string on my guitar which through off the tuning, but not enough for me to know that it was out of tune right away. I was borrowing an amp that I would have rather not used...and I actually didn't. I finished set up without realizing any of this. I started playing at once realizing that my guitar was not playing what it should tone wise, and for that matter the sound coming out is sporadic and horrible. I'm not happy, and I'm confused. I assumed, because I needed to(desperately needed too), that there is something wrong with the amp. I switched aways from the amp and ran directly into the system, praying that this simple fix was all that was needed...it wasn't. I picked up the closest direct box and plugged in. Nothing, no sound, no nothing. My dad, whose thankfully the sound man for the service, quickly came up to give me a hand. I told the leader to just start and keep going, and that I would pick up when I could. Dad quickly flushed out the problem, the other end of the cord never got plugged into the system, I sighed heavily. Not happy but appeased. I strum...sporadic and fuzzy...getting annoyed. I checked all of my lines, no response through the system. Strum one more time...accidentally touching the pickups, response. Stunned and trying again, same response...beyond angry. Dad takes guitar before I break it (literally). I spent the next ten minuets hooking up someone else's guitar praying hard that it wouldn't work, it didn't. Now I'm angry that I've wasted so much time switching guitars. Dad tells me that the chord I picked up wasn't working. I stare blankly, wondering why I'm learning this now. I don't remember saying anything out loud, and I hope that didn't, I pray that I didn't. No one said anything, but they could have been just being polite. I reattach my guitar, change out the lines two more times before finding the last working free line on the stage. With everything finally set, I notice that the one string is still out, I fix it. I let off the bypass and strum hoping to hear my guitar...nothing. Dad had changed the line I was connected to, and didn't tell the guy at the soundboard. Five more minuets and one button later I finally hear my guitar. So with one song left to practice I was set to go. Not enough coffee in the world, no where near enough coffee for that.

My morning. I wish I could give it back. I thought about it, and all I really needed to do was change on line and I would have been fine, but it was the sequence of events that set me off. I normally have a tight reign on temper, but this morning...I'm just happy I had a reign on my tongue. I don't feel good about it, I'm embarrassed by it. I was beyond frustrated, beyond angry, and that my dad had to take my guitar from my hands is just embarrassing. It wasn't a proud moment to be sure. I just couldn't help being angry at what happened, and how simply it could have been solved. I was able to spend time in prayer before we started, and just asked God to settle my mind and focus on Him, and thankfully he did. But now, at the end of the day, I remember what happened. I don't have a good lesson from all of this. In certain respects I'm ashamed of how I reacted and in others I know I acted correctly. I think that this is one of those days where drawing even is a win.

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