Dé Luain, Aibreán 04, 2005

Somethings missing

I have the distinct feeling that I'm missing something. The conversations I've had today have varied quite a bit. Most of them with one of my best friends. I'm working with her on her final sermon, helping develop ideas for what will take place, and the music that will be done. The group was only semi-productive to say the least though I believe that we did accomplish everything that we set out to do. I think. We've got music, we've got set up, we've got production, she's got the sermon and I think we're ready to go. Conversations with other friends on the future, mainly mine since I'm graduating and people want to know what's up with me. Then there was the completly theological conversation that I had with the original friend that is for mentioned here. A really good conversation on the voice of God and whether or not we can actually perceive it, whether or not it's our fault. Is God really silent? Personally it sounds like a really good paper to write and discuss later on. Chance of me doing that...zero. Not any time soon anyway. It may make a good sermon, though most of the theory would have to find hard fact and scripture referance first. Good conversations, Good day. Actually I think I'll pose that question to you. Is God really silent? What's your proof? Is it possible that when you believed God to be silent you simply weren't asking the right question, or listening to the right responce? Could it have been your fault that you didn't here God at that point in your life?

But still it feels like something is missing. I'm not sure what. So much has happened in the past three days, something could have slipped through the cracks. The Pope has died, and many of my Roman Catholic bretheren around the world are without an earthly leader. I'm not Catholic, but still it is a great loss. Many will now be searching for that leader. I only hope that the right man will be found to lead the Roman Catholic Church. Terry Shaivo has died, and still the on going legal battles are of captial importance in our country. Do we have the right to death? Do we have the right to Life? Should the government be involved in these matters? On a personal note I believe that Shaivo had a right to die. Though I am sickened by the manner in which it took place. We fight to save starving people all over the world, many of whom are on the last breath and just waiting to die, yet we will let Mrs. Shaive die in this manner. Do I think she wanted to die? That I can't answer, I know I would rather have died peacefully and with out pictures of my wasted form plastered all over national television. But still something is missing.

I just don't know. It feels like there's more, and I guess that there will always be more in a sense, but that doesn't resolve my problem. Maybe I'll find it in sleep tonight, or maybe like we talked earlier, silence is the only answer.

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