Dé Céadaoin, Feabhra 23, 2005

75 or bust

I was thinking earlier about how I've often said that I don't plan on living past the age of 75. I really don't. On this thought I began to have a conversation with myself (no I'm not crazy) about how ludicris this statement might be, but I actually have several reasons as to why this might not be to far from the truth.

Reason One - This is me we're talking about here. I'm not always known for making "good" decisions, or having safe past-times. For example, diving 2400 miles in a weekend to make it to a friends wedding, the shear amount and distences that I drive by myself, especially considering the times I've driven long distances (6 hrs or more) on less than three hours of sleep, doing double doses of Nyquil then forcing myself to stay awake to watch a movie because it will be funnier that way, Alpine Skiing, never looking when walking across the street, standing in the line of traffic for fun, my constant neglect of personal safty, holding bottle rockets in my hand until they take off, or almost explode. I'm not smart, you'll never hear me say that I'm smart. I'm sure I friends out there who have many more stories to add to this area. I'm as likely to die saying, "hey guys watch this!" as I am lieing in my bed at a ripe old age, probably more likely.

Reason Two - I'm a musician and we're not known for our longevity. How many composers do you know that actually lived long, happy, productive lives. Not many. I mean seriously, we're plagued with bad marriages, emprisonment, poverty, public humiliation, drug abuse, alciohol abuse, venereal disease, insanity and other mental problems, depression, the list just keeps going. We're screwed up people. Walk into any music department of any college and you'll know, there's a reason we normally don't have friends outside of the department. Man if I'm not deft, blind, and half way insane by 75, I'll want to end it just to make sure it doesn't happen. Kind of like retiring in my prime instead of trying to stick it out with younger players.

Reason Three - I'm not exactly headed in to the church after I'm done here at the WU. I'm planning on going into the mission field. I'll probably where myself out, and die on some mountianside somewhere. That's really all I have to say here

So after this rather morbid thought process I got out of the shower and took a nap. Yes, I was so relaxed I was able to sleep. But lets face it, I'm not afraid of many things, and death really isn't in that list, though it probably should be. In anycase it was kind of fun to think about. I'm not actually going to euthanise myself at the age of 75, I'm not even sure I'll make it to that point, but if I do I'm sure I'll come up with a few reasons to keep going. When God is done with me, I'll go home.

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